Truth
and Love
Justin knocked on the door and
waited for only a moment before Aradon opened it. The butler smiled and bowed
him inside.
“Would you like me to take your
jacket, Master Justin?” He asked politely.
“That won’t be necessary, Aradon.
He’ll need it.” Kiliki spoke, appearing in the doorway of the parlor.
Aradon nodded and left the hallway,
closing the front door.
Justin looked at Kiliki and waited.
Obviously, she knew something he didn’t.
Kiliki studied him for a moment and
grinned. “I’m glad, Justin. She’s by the pond.”
“Glad?” Justin asked, but Kiliki
had already disappeared back into the parlor. Justin shook his head in
amazement. He had only stepped in the door. How could she have known? Yet,
somehow, he was sure she did know he had given his life to God.
He decided not to question her, but
to head to the pond immediately to find Dabria. She was the one he needed to
speak to. His horse seemed to sense his urgency and moved at a quick pace
towards the clear blue water. It was a relief to finally see the top of the
large tree that stood at its edge finally come into view. Justin frowned as he
approached. There was only one horse tethered to the tree, happily munching on
the grass. They hadn’t left Dabria alone. Where was Salena?
He pulled his horse to a walk and
approached the pond more slowly, not wanting to startle her. A quick flash back
took him to the last time he had met Dabria in this very spot. The meeting had
ended far differently than he planned. He could only pray this time would be a happier
ending. He smiled at how easily it was to think of praying for a good result.
Still, that would depend on Dabria’s health and what she could understand. If
there was only one horse, perhaps she was better? Or was Salena simply giving
her a little space?
Justin jumped down off his horse
and scanned the area. He had brought his own steed next to the tethered one and
he quickly did the same to his. Stepping around the horse, he saw Dabria,
completely absorbed, at the water’s edge. She looked to be playing with the
water, letting it lap at her hand gently. She made quite the picture with her
light blue dress contrasting against the deep blue green of the water. Her
white blond hair pushed back from her face slightly on the side facing him and
hanging down freely on the other. A small smile played with her lips as if
whatever she was thinking created a small moment of joy for her. From here,
Justin couldn’t see if her eyes were clear or not, but the scene gave him hope.
“Dabria?” He called gently.
The girl’s hand movements still and
she glanced slowly up. Her smile broadened and lit up her face. “Justin.” She
stood and for a moment looked as if she would run to him, but seemed to catch
herself. Instead, she walked towards him and he met her half way. “It’s been a
long time.”
“Not as long for me has it has been
for you,” Justin replied smiling. “You’re better.”
Dabria nodded. “For a few days now.
We’ve been waiting for you to get back. The others will be pleased.”
The others? Justin almost
questioned out loud. What about her? “I already saw Kiliki. I’m sure she will
let them know. She told me where to find you.”
“That does sound like my sister.
Did she even say hello to you?”
Justin frowned for a moment then
laughed. “Actually, no.”
Dabria smiled and shrugged. “She
has her priorities.”
An awkward silence filled the space
between them. It had been so long and the last time they had parted it had not
been on good terms. Justin was surprised though that the pain could seem to
last and take away their once easy conversation.
“It’s been a long time since we
last stood here,” Justin finally said.
“Yes,” Dabria whispered, her eyes
not leaving Justin’s face.
He shifted uncomfortably. How was
he supposed to say this? He shot up a quick prayer to his new Father and the answer
seemed to grow in his heart. “Dabria, I was a fool then. I’m sorry.”
“A fool? Why do you think that?”
Dabria asked, curious, but not denying the validity of his statement.
“I was so full of myself, my pride,
it seems to be my downfall,” Justin admitted. “I was angry at you for not
fighting, for giving in so easily, but what I offered in return wasn’t really
an answer, just a delay tactic. I should have realized before I even asked that
you would have to tell me no.”
Dabria still didn’t move and Justin
swallowed. She wasn’t going to make this easy at all.
“Are you going to say anything?”
Justin finally asked.
“What would you like me to say?”
Dabria questioned, crossing her arms.
“Something besides just staring at
me!”
“I accept your apology,” she
finally answered.
Justin frowned. He was glad of
that, but something was drastically wrong with her. Dabria was much too closed
off. As if she was refusing to get emotional about anything, which was highly
unlike her.
“Okay, what’s wrong? What did I do
this time?” Justin asked frustrated.
Dabria blinked. “Wrong? Nothing.”
“Then why are you staring at me
like a statue? Where is all that Dabria emotion?”
“Maybe it’s all been spent,” Dabria
said quietly.
“Spent?”
Dabria uncrossed her arms and
turned her back to him walking back to the edge of the lake. Justin followed
quietly, unsure what else to do.
“It has been a long time,” Dabria
muttered. “So much has changed and yet, here it seems like nothing has. I feel
so drained at times. Out here, I feel just a little more alive, like God is
still smiling and things can work out.”
“You don’t think that at the
house?” Justin asked.
“Sometimes. But it can be hard to
think at all in there.”
Justin nodded, knowing that feeling
quite well.
“I survived a kidnapping, managed
to close my mind off from all contact, was rescued, and yet, it was all a side
adventure. The truth still remains that per my parents’ orders, I am engaged to
be married to Leon at the appropriate time. Everything has changed and yet it
all remains the same.”
“No, Pixie, nothing remains the
same, not anymore,” Justin corrected softly.
Dabria turned to him. “What do you
mean?”
“That’s what I’ve come to tell you.
I found another option, but this time I offer it humbly and I will hold no
resentment against you if you should tell me no,” Justin spoke firmly, but he
could feel his stomach tightening at that possibility. What would he do then?
Perhaps leave for foreign lands and never return.
“Um, all right,” Dabria replied,
nervously.
Justin took a step forward and gathered
her hands in his. Then took a deep breath and spoke, “I stood here months ago
and offered to find you the perfect guy. I wanted you to have someone who would
understand you and your spirit. To know you are the one that matters above all
others and he never wants to leave your side, but to help you follow all your
dreams. I was young and foolish to ask you to go and look for such a man.”
“Why?” Dabria whispered, her voice
sounding like she might cry.
“I was so mad at you for not
wanting to fight for what you deserved,” Justin continued as if he hadn’t heard
her. “I couldn’t see past that. You accused me of abandoning you and that was
exactly what I was doing again. I just didn’t know it.”
“I shouldn’t have made you feel
that way. You did come for me faithfully. I was just hurt and…” Dabria had to
stop when Justin dropped one of her hands to move his fingers to her mouth.
“You were right. I did think about
you when you weren’t on my ship, I always thought of you, but I never went to
your house unless it was time to bring you here. I could easily have stopped
and yet I didn’t. While you were never far from my thoughts, in that way I did
abandon you. I was furious with myself and yet last time we stood here, I let
it happen again. I didn’t think I had a choice after you chose him.” Justin
said ‘him’ like it was a filthy word. “But it was my turn to fight and I
didn’t.”
“I hurt you and I did it on
purpose,” Dabria whispered.
“What?” Justin asked, surprised.
“I was so angry at you. You said
all the right things but in all the wrong ways. I wanted you to understand me,
to understand what I felt, but you never did. I was so angry and hurt; I agreed
to marry Leon out of frustration. I should never have done that. It has caused
so much pain, but I was desperate and thinking with my heart instead of my
head. Your problem may be pride, but that is mine,” Dabria admitted.
“I guess we both made some big
mistakes.” Justin dropped her other hand from his and Dabria only nodded.
“We are both strong willed and hot
tempered as Aunt Jada would say,” Dabria said a few moments later.
“Aunt Jada usually gets it right,”
Justin agreed.
“It’s because of that we let this
get so far out of hand,” Dabria muttered.
“When we should have trusted each
other, we hurt each other instead.”
“I’ve always trusted you, Justin. I
know you’ve always wanted what’s best for me, but your actions to that end
aren’t always… the best,” Dabria finally finished.
Justin laughed. “I know. I’ve let
my pride and my need for control take up to much of my life. I think I was
holding on so tightly that I lost what I could have had because of it.” He
paused and turned to her, “Like you.”
Dabria’s face stilled and slowly
she turned to look up at him. “Me?” She whispered.
“You asked me long ago to
understand. I couldn’t then. But I thought long and hard about what you were
trying to tell me that day. You said you wanted the man I described, but it
took me a long time to realize I should have been that man.”
“You?” Dabria squeaked.
“I love you, Dabria. I need you as
much as I think you need me.” Once again, he gathered her hand in his and
tugged gently, pulling her close. “I want to be that man for you, Dabria. I
want to show you the world in a way you have never seen, to take you on
adventures where your spirit is free. My world crashed when I thought I had
lost you, first to Leon and then to Walton. All I could think of was finding
and protecting you. I wanted to feel you in my arms, to know you were safe, and
never let you go. I love you so much. You are so amazing, my Pixie, I’ve
watched you grow into a woman that any man would be glad to call his wife. But
I don’t want you to be in the arms of just any man. I want you in mine.”
“Justin…” Dabria tried to speak,
but her eyes were teary and her thoughts jumbled.
“I know, I know I’m not really
worthy of you, but I’ve learned that I’m not worthy of anything without God. I
gave my life to Him, Dabria, only a few nights ago. He has been teaching me
hard lessons and I’m not so sure I’ve learned them all, but I’m willing to try.
Kiliki said that until I learned to love the God you serve, I’d never be able
to love you the way you deserved. I’m still not sure I can, but I know God will
help me every day to be a man worthy of being called your husband.”
“Husband…” Dabria was having issues
getting more than one word out at a time.
“I think we can follow Him better
together than we can apart. We can be the couple He wants us to be. I have no
idea what that looks like or where He might take us, but I’d really like to
find out. What do you say, Dabria, will you marry me?” Justin held his breath.
Dabria laid her head on his chest
for a moment and seemed to breathe deeply, so Justin released her hands to wrap
his arms around her and hold her. He took a deep breath and prayed for patience
and an answer he could live with.
“That night, so long ago,” Dabria
murmured against his chest and Justin had to strain slightly to hear her, “I
knew you were outside my window. I wanted so badly to go to you and make you
understand. When you described the perfect husband for me, Justin, all I wanted
in that moment was for that man to be you.”
Justin’s heart leapt and he moved
her back slightly, so he could raise her chin to allow their eyes to meet.
“That’s what you wanted? I wish I had known then!”
“You weren’t ready and, I guess,
neither was I. But I knew. I had been fighting it for so long. When I was just
a child on your boat, I developed such a crush on you. But I always thought it
would go away and then when I heard you speak that night, I knew it was hopeless.
At some point over the years, I had fallen in love with you.”
Dabria’s admission made Justin
react without thinking. Slowly, his head came down and hers rose to meet him.
In an instant, their lips met in love’s first kiss. It started in a way that
was gentle and sweet and yet in moments it was filled with passion and desire.
A promise of a life they had both been waiting for, a kiss in its purest form.
It was a long time before either of
them lifted their heads. They breathed together for a moment, basking in the
knowledge that they belonged to each other.
“That is a yes then?” Justin asked,
with a knowing smile.
“Yes, my love,” Dabria paused,
frowning.
“What is it?” Justin asked, concern
flowing through him.
“Leon. We can’t make it official
until I break off the engagement with him. My parents will not be happy,”
Dabria sighed.
“Can we tell the family?” Justin
almost pleaded.
Dabria laughed. “I’m not so sure we
are going to have to!”
“True. Kiliki’s probably already
told them it’s coming anyway.”
“Which means Aunt Jada is planning
a celebration. But Leon...that’s cruel to him,” Dabria fretted.
“Don’t worry, love, we will nicely
force her to keep it quiet until you can break it off. As for your parents,
once you are married, there is nothing they can do, except perhaps cut you
off.”
Dabria tilted her head, thinking.
“They might. But I’m their only true daughter. I don’t think it will last.”
“Then it’s all settled?” Justin
asked, cautiously.
“I guess so. But, what will we do?
Where will we live?” Dabria’s question kept coming.
Justin laughed and kissed her
silent. “We will live on The Guardian
Star for now. As for what we will do, we will know when God tells us.”
“Living on The Guardian Star… we have some adjustments to make in that cabin
of yours!” Dabria warned, but Justin just laughed.
“Make all the adjustments you want,
Pixie. Would you be happy living on The
Guardian Star? It is far different then only spending a couple of weeks on
it at a time.”
“Of course, I love being on the sea
and your ship has always been my home. Can we stop and see all the different
places in Zerlinda?” Dabria asked, her excitement causing her to bounce a
little.
Justin wrapped his arms around her
tightly and picking her up, spun her in circles, until they were both laughing so
hard he had to set her down. “As long as we are together, we can go anywhere
you want and have whatever adventures you want to try. As long, as you aren’t
in real danger,” Justin amended quickly, as he thought out loud. “I think God
will change my current mission on the sea as The Falconer. Perhaps, only my
motivation has changed, but until God points us in the direction He wants us to
follow, we may do whatever you like.”
“I like the sound of that!” Dabria
agreed promptly. She sighed and snuggled in close to Justin. “To think, dreams
do come true.”
Justin hugged her close. “Yes, if
you’re not too stubborn to let God work. We are going to have a wonderful life,
Dabria, with God has our Guardian Star.”
“I cannot wait to begin it, my love.”
They
shared a smile and Justin kissed his bride to be with the promise of tomorrow.
>~>~>~><~<~<~<